This weekend I am finally having some down time as I recover from this cough/congestion I've had for the past couple of days.
These past couple of months have been such a learning experience. As the new year began, I found myself super busy and worn out! I had been working my full time in addition to an after school job. I rarely had time for anything and some of it was due to my lack of discipline with the little time I had but nevertheless, it was exhausting. I knew it was time for a change! The bad thing is sometimes I hold on to things for too long. Due to a series of events, however, it was either work more hours for the after school gig or give it up (Divine Intervention). So I chose the latter. Life is short and time is something we can never get back.
This new season is definitely requiring putting my faith into action. Earlier today, I was reflecting on how I came to truly believe in God. I remember once lonnnng ago when I was around seven or eight, I was out walking with my mom. I remember asking her "How do you know God is real?" Although I don't remember her full answer, I remember her saying something along the lines like "Pray to Him and He will show you." So I did what children do, I prayed for the most random thing!!!! I remember asking God if He was real, could He make this random kid in my class who didn't have my number call me. So as I walked in the house after our walk, the phone was ringing. I was so shocked when I answered! It was the random kid calling me!
As time went on, I knew God was always with me even when I distanced myself through my many mistakes. There was always this internal pull or longing. As the years went by and I became an adult, I sought God more and more. Sometimes though, I equated Him to materialism. Like If I doing right, He will bless me with things. Through hard seasons however, I learned things are things and we can not try to use God for our selfish desires. Things and people are here one day and gone the next but God remains. Plus the things never truly fulfilled me, as I was always wanting more things. For only God can truly fill us as our value is in Him alone.
The more I sought Him, the more He allowed me to find Him (Jeremish 20:13 "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."). The more I begin to grow in my walk with God and purely seek HIM, the more I am beginning to see Him at work in my life. Last month, while I was on my way to visit my niece, I quietly prayed in my heart like "God please let the rain hold off at least until two and more importably please let this day go well." The day ended up being beautiful, and right as I was leaving at two, it began to drizzle outside! I immediately thanked God as I knew He answered my prayer. The next, I took my nephew out for breakfast and as we were on our way to pick up the food, he begins to pray that it will pour down raining on us because he thought it would be fun to get wet in the rain. Somehow I knew his prayer would be answered. So as we were gathering our things to leave as we had eaten most of our breakfast outside per his request, it began to pour down raining on us. I mean wind blowing and everything. And What does he do?? Laughs!!!!! But I too was laughing, as I realized God answered his little prayer as He had answered mine the day before.
Last summer or fall I was out shopping for cheap movies at Goodwill since I don't have cable (every coin counts, I'm just saying). I had been wanting an old film camera and to my surprise there was one at that particular Goodwill! I went back and forth for the longest on whether I should get it. I even called my sister in law, who convinced me to wait (although at the time I wasn't trying to hear that). But I listened and left it there as I'm doing my best not to purchase things on impulse. As the week went on, I kept thinking about the camera. I even went back to the Goodwill, but I couldn't bring myself to pay $60 for something I didn't know whether it would work or not (plus I needed my coins). Fast forward three weeks ago, an artist who was in an exhibit with me, tells me he has an old film camera that I could have if I wanted it. I was like sure!!!! So when I picked it up last weekend, to my surprise it was pretty much like the same camera I wanted at Goodwill! God gives us the desires of our heart but it's on His time (Psalm 37:4 "Take delight in the Lord, and He will give your the desires of your heart").
There are so many other ways God has worked in my life. I find the more that PURELY seek him, the more He has answered the simplest of prayers. Sometimes, we are so focused on receiving our selfish desires, that we miss all that God is doing. Having a relationship with Him is not so we can gain the things of this world, but it so we may gain HIS qualities, (joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness faithfulness, gentleness, and self control Galatians 5:22-23), to fulfill HIS will and do His work in this world. God is real and His spirit is ready and willing to work within. He gives us these many answers and much more so we know He hears us and is with us but we have to do OUR PART and TRULY and PURELY seek him. So believe, for God is real and waiting on US. For the peace we long for can only be found in HIM ("Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubles and do not be afraid." John 14:27).
Seek God more than anything in this world and watch Him work it out for our good (Romans 8:28)
Here are a few random photos I've captured on my iPhone these past few months...